How to Cope with Empty Nest Depression
If your children have recently left home, you might be feeling a mix of pride, sadness, and loss. You spent years helping your children grow into adults who could stand on their own two feet. Although you couldn’t be happier to see them achieving their goals and moving forward in life, you miss spending time with them each day.
Lots of parents experience “empty nest depression” when their children move out. Empty nest depression is characterized by the grief and identity shift that often accompany this transition. These feelings are completely normal. With time and patience, these tips can help you cope with your emotions and rebuild your sense of meaning.
Allow Yourself to Grieve
Have you tried to dismiss your empty nest depression or tell yourself that it’s not such a big deal? Rather than suppressing these emotions, give yourself space to acknowledge your feelings. It’s entirely possible to feel excited for your children’s futures while quietly mourning this major change in your household.
You may want to open up to your partner or reach out to other friends who have become empty nesters. Alternatively, you could write in a journal to express yourself and get your thoughts down on paper.
Strengthen Your Relationships with Your Support System
With your children establishing their own lives, an empty nest is an invitation to strengthen your relationship with your partner and your close friends. It can be hard to balance these different relationships when you’re actively parenting. But as an empty nester, it’s usually easier. Emotional closeness can ease loneliness.
If you’re married, you and your partner have the opportunity to spend more time together. You might want to schedule regular date nights, plan a trip somewhere out of town, or invite friends over for a party. Perhaps you’ve always wanted to try out a new hobby together, or take on a collaborative creative project. Now is the perfect time!
Reconnect with Yourself
An empty nest doesn’t just open up chances to get closer to your partner and friends. You can also embrace this new chapter by turning back to your hobbies, passions, and goals that you might have set aside while raising children.
You can use your time to rediscover your personal interests or pursue new activities. As an empty nester, you can prioritize self-growth and get back in touch with your individuality beyond your role as a parent.
Keep in Touch with Your Children
Although your relationship with your children will change after they move out, you will still play an important part in their lives. You might want to schedule weekly phone calls, plan future visits, or send your children gifts or care packages.
You can set boundaries that respect your children’s independence while keeping communication open. At this stage in life, your bond is about quality time rather than the quantity of time together.
Prioritize Your Well-Being
When you’re actively parenting, you know that your children’s well-being comes first. However, when you’re an empty nester, you can put yourself first again. If you’ve been thinking about going to therapy to adapt to these changes, it might be time to start looking for a counselor.
Getting used to an empty nest can be tricky. Sometimes, talking to your partner and friends doesn’t quite cut it. A depression therapist can help you maintain your relationships with your adult children while finding the bright side of this phase of life.
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If you’re struggling to adjust to an empty nest, our therapists are here to support you through this tough time. We encourage you to reach out to our practice and learn more about how we can help.