What Is Internal Family Systems Therapy? A Guide to the IFS Model
Do you ever feel like you’re constantly in conflict with yourself? Maybe it seems like part of you wants to reach a specific goal, while another part of you would rather hold back out of fear. Perhaps you struggle to change harmful behavioral patterns or self-destructive habits because you fall back into old routines that feel “safe” and comfortable. At times, it might seem like half of you is stuck in the past and trapped by fears and anxieties that you think you should have been able to let go of by now.
When you’re dealing with internal conflict, it could be because you have old wounds and painful emotions from past experiences that contradict your true desires. This makes it hard to maintain a state of internal balance. Internal Family Systems (IFS) can help you identify these distinct parts and cultivate true harmony within yourself.
Understanding IFS Therapy
IFS therapy is centered around the idea that we all have several sub-personalities, or “families,” within our mental systems. These sub-personalities are characterized by uncomfortable or painful emotions, such as anger, guilt, shame, or sadness, as well as other parts that try to protect you from this pain. Through IFS, you can finally heal these wounded parts so that you can start living in accordance with your genuine Self, fostering a sense of inner peace and true confidence.
Different Types of “Parts”
IFS therapists separate parts into three specific categories. Protective parts are known as “managers.” These parts attempt to exert some level of control over your environment in order to keep you safe, suppressing painful and complicated emotions so that you can navigate your daily life.
“Exiles” are wounded parts that hold on to shame from your past, internalizing the difficult memories that are linked to these experiences. Ultimately, managers aim to prevent you from truly feeling the pain carried by exiles.
There are also parts called “firefighters,” which spring into action when exiles do bring up overwhelming emotions. Exiles often function as escapist habits, like substance abuse or endless scrolling, to numb the pain.
Connecting with the “Self”
Your parts are trying to protect you in different ways. But their contradictory nature interferes with your connection to your core Self. IFS therapists uphold the principle that everyone possesses a core self, which you have the power to tap into. Your Self is capable of observing and supporting your parts so that they can cooperate.
The self is defined by a range of positive traits, such as confidence, creativity, and a sense of purpose. When you’re able to embrace these traits, it means you’re acting from your core Self.
What to Expect in IFS Sessions
IFS sessions can differ from traditional talk therapy. You’ll start by identifying specific parts with your therapist and paying attention to these parts. Next, you’ll describe your experiences with these parts and explore your feelings towards them. Then you’ll be ready to befriend the part through curiosity and mindfulness and learn what the part fears—and how you could change its role. Over time, you’ll be able to harmonize these parts so they can work together, with the Self in charge.
Who Can Benefit from IFS?
IFS can be helpful for people struggling with depression, anxiety, panic disorder, and trauma. It can also be part of a treatment plan for breaking patterns like substance abuse or binge eating. However, IFS might not be right for people with disorders like schizophrenia. It’s important to talk to a trauma therapist about your symptoms before starting IFS.
–
Are you curious about whether Internal Family Systems might be a good fit for you? Contact our practice to schedule a free consultation and learn more about our approach to IFS.